Baby Mim - 2 Weeks

Dear Mim,

How do I even begin to describe just how wonderful these last two weeks have been, since you entered our lives?  I've struggled to write this post, partly because I'm scared to jinx us with bragging about what a good baby you are and partly because I'm still trying to process the overwhelming amount of love I have for you (or perhaps it's due to sleep deprivation and exhaustion).  I just can't seem to find the right words, which is why this post is being published days later than I anticipated.  Hopefully the words pouring out of my heart onto this page make sense and someday you will read them and know just how loved, wanted and adored you are.    

When I was pregnant I heard so many people say that when you have a second child, you question whether or not you can ever love that child as much as you do your first.  For some reason, I never felt that way.  I knew immediately upon finding out that we were pregnant that I could easily love you just as fiercely as I love your brother.  However, I was not expecting that love to be so intense so early in your little life.  With Mac, it took a while for me to really wrap my head around the fact that I had a child and he was mine.  With you, that connection was instant.  From the moment that I heard your cry in that operating room, I loved you more than I ever thought possible.  It took everything I had (and all those drugs), not to jump off the table and scoop you up.  I nearly took the nurse's head off because I wanted her to be gentler with you and get you wrapped up and warm right away. Those mama bear instincts sure didn't miss a beat. All I wanted was you...in my arms and safe. From that moment on I knew I would spend the rest of my life trying to keep you safe and protected.

The adjustment to your new home seems to be going relatively well; however, we've had our issues.  Mac is still having a very difficult time adjusting to his new role as big brother and you had a difficult time settling down those first few nights.  With respect to the latter, I think that just may be the case with all newborns - adjusting to a new place, with new smells and sounds is probably a bit overwhelming for a baby.  Your dad and I took turns bouncing, holding and rocking you for hours each night.  I think we may have gotten a collective 2-3 hours of sleep each night.  But by the third night and ever since, you've been surprisingly pleasant in the evenings. You want to eat quite a bit (still every 2-3 hours), but most of the time you will go right back to sleep after a feeding. You haven't really given us any long stretches of sleep, but at least you haven't been keeping us up all night crying (knocking on wood right now).  Hiccups, gas and dirty diapers seem to be the biggest obstacles to us all sleeping well in between feedings.  Once we get past those issues, we're good to go.

As for Mac, he's just being a typical two-year old adjusting to a new situation.  We're dealing with lots of tantrums, meltdowns over ridiculous things and pushing the limits/boundaries every chance he can get. We've been giving him a lot of special attention lately, which may be part of the problem, but he's having a hard time learning how to share his parents and adjusting to our new "normal" with me being home all day.  We knew it would be a tough adjustment, but we also know that it'll get easier for all of us as time goes by.  He does seem to really like you though and is always concerned about whether you're happy or sad. It's very sweet to watch him react to you and try to interact.  One of these days he's going to be your best friend and biggest fan.  Don't worry, we'll get there.

For the most part, you are such a good baby!  Well, I'm not sure if you really are that amazing or if we are just used to having a very difficult baby with your brother, so you seem easy in comparison, but either way, we love it!  Everyone told me that you'd be very different than your brother and you have proven that to be absolutely true. You do look like him, but the comparison ends there.  He loved to be swaddled; you love your hands out. He needed the white noise to calm down; you like it quiet.  He was a horrible eater; you are a rockstar eater. He never took a pacifier; you will chomp away on one.  He loved to be naked; you hate being cold.  He never cared about getting his diaper changed; you demand a new diaper every 20 minutes. He cried for no reason; you only cry for valid reasons.  We are so grateful that you've been so good to us these last two weeks and really hope that it continues (for the rest of your life, ok?).  

Slowly but surely we are getting to know you and your personality.  You're still not awake for long periods of time, but when you are bright-eyed, you're so inquisitive and expressive.  I love the faces you make and all your sweet noises.  You love looking at me and watching the dogs and the ceiling fan.  You are such a sweetheart and so wonderfully cuddly.  I knew you were going to be snuggly while I was still pregnant with you.  When I would sleep, you'd snuggle into a little ball, all nice and tight, way down in my belly.  When I'd move, it'd take a while for you to get repositioned out of your snuggle ball, which was sometimes really uncomfortable for me.  I'd prod and poke you through my belly, trying to convince you to move, but you'd stay put, cuddled up.  Now that you're out, not much has changed.  You love to be held and cuddled.  You curl up into a tiny ball of love in our arms and snuggle right in.  You are so comfortable and snuggly that it makes it nearly impossible for us to put you down.  You get held a lot.

Everyone has commented about how much you look like your brother, which I agree with.  However, as the days go by I think you are starting to look less like him and more like your own person.  I still can't figure out just who in our family I think you look like the most - right now you're a mix of your dad, your cousin Alex and my Grandma Bert. Strange, but beautiful.  You were born with dark hair and grey/blue eyes - the same combination Mac had.  I wonder whether your hair will stay dark like your dad's, light like mine or even red like Alex's.  You have the most elegant long fingers of any baby I've ever seen. And the longest skinniest feet - they look like skis with monkey toes!  Everyone's commented on your giant feet, saying that you're destined to be an athlete (and tall)!  You're finally getting your chubby cheeks back, after losing some of your initial weight in the hospital.  I love babies with chubby cheeks, so this absolutely thrills me.  You have a tiny Angel Kiss on your left eyelid and the most beautiful little lips and button nose.  I truly think you are one of the most gorgeous babies I've ever seen.  

Speaking of gaining weight, you are a champion eater and have been packing on the ounces these days.  At your two week appointment, you more than doubled the average newborn weight gain, which put you well above your birth weight!  Go Mim!  It's so important that you gain weight right now, so we're doing all we can to make sure you eat as much as you want.  Fortunately, breastfeeding is going really well for us this time around, which is a major stress relief for me and probably deserves an entire post on its own.  I have been so worried about this aspect of having a newborn,  as it was a huge point of stress for me the first time around (which you can read about here).  But you have made it easy for me.  You latched on right away with ease, my milk came in on day 3 (lots of it!) and we've been doing great ever since.  This has truly been a blessing and (despite the pain, which I hope will fade within the next few weeks) has quickly become one of my favorite things about having a newborn.  It really is amazing how different the experience has been this time around. 

So, in a nutshell, we are madly in love with you, little one.  I love spending my days with you in my arms and your daddy just can't get enough of you in the evenings.  These last two weeks have just flown by and I'm terrified that the next 10 will go just as fast, sending me back to work before I'm ready to leave you.  Actually, I already know I won't be ready.  It's going to be so hard and I'm just trying desperately not to think about it right now.  I'm soaking up every moment I get with you and seem to spend hours just staring at you, kissing you and smelling you.  Knowing you're my last baby makes it all feel so fleeting.  As excited as I am for you to get older, I'm going to miss having a baby around.  Just promise me you won't grow up too quickly.

Thank you, Mim for being a part of our family.  We are so happy to have you in our lives. You already have us wrapped around your long beautiful fingers and we wouldn't change it for the world.  We are so incredibly blessed.

Love,
Your mama 

Baby Mac - 2 Weeks