Running from the Law: Out and About at the Pumpkin Patch

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Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Out and About at the Pumpkin Patch

Is anyone else in total denial that summer's over and it's already fall?  I just don't know how that happened.  I'm not really complaining about it being fall (it's my favorite season and the weather is lovely), but I'm just shocked and confused about how the summer went by that quickly.  You'd think that when you have a new baby and a toddler and haven't slept longer than 4 hours in a row for weeks that time would feel like it's creeping by, but the opposite is true.  I blinked and three months disappeared in a blur of diaper changes, midnight feeding sessions and Goodnight Moon on repeat.  
Fall has come on fast and furious around here.  The weather this past weekend plummeted into the forties, causing us all to break out those hats, jackets and scarves a bit earlier than anticipated.  Although again, I'm not complaining.  I love those first few weeks of cool weather when all your warm sweaters and boots resurface, feeling like you have a whole new wardrobe to play with.  And of course, fall weather also means a whole host of new activities and things to do outside.  There's something about the slight crisp chill in the air that makes me want to get out of the house and explore.
This past weekend we (and everyone else in St. Louis county) decided to head out to a local pumpkin patch.  I was dying to get some beautiful photos for the blog of our family with a backdrop of orange and green.  I mean, is there anything that bloggers love more than pumpkin patches, cute kids and boots?  I had grand visions of a perfect day playing in a sea of pumpkins, family hayrides, carmel apples and hot chocolate. However, reality with two kids is VERY different than what I daydreamed about.  Yes, I did manage to take a few pretty pictures, but life is not quite so pretty behind the scenes.  So, this is the true story about how our outing really went.
First of all, it only took us 45 minutes to pack a bag and get the kids in the car - that's significantly less time than it took a few weeks ago.  Perhaps by Christmas we'll be able to leave in under 30 minutes...but I'm not holding my breath.  Mac had two tantrums about which shoes he wanted to wear (Crocs with socks was NOT an option I was going to let him get away with) and Mim decided to nap (but only on me) instead of eat, which I knew we would all pay for later.  And then my husband thought it was the perfect time to search for his favorite shirt, which has been missing for months and was turning our house upside down looking for it.  Perfect time for a man who cares nothing about clothing to have a wardrobe crisis.  But I was determined not to let any of that stop us...I was excited to get out of the house and show Mac all the fun stuff to do at the pumpkin patch. Of course, I underestimated the overwhelming chaos of it all and the fact that babies do not care about pumpkins and toddlers' only mission in life is to ruin everything and possibly cause you to have a heart attack at an early age.  
Once we got there, it was only slightly less intense getting out of the car than getting in it.  After 10 minutes of screaming bloody murder in the car, Mim finally passed out, only to wake up ravenous from not eating earlier.  Mac insisted on being on daddy's shoulders (he doesn't get more than 2 feet from Ryan at any given time on weekends) and Mim stayed in her carseat, covered by the JJ Cole BundleMe.  I actually received the BundleMe from the company to review here on the blog and have already fallen in love with it.  So yes, this is partially a product review post and partially a reminder to the future me about how impossible it is to do absolutely ANYTHING with a baby and toddler, just in case my hormones get the best of me and I want another baby in a few years.  Refer back to this post.
Anyhoo...I never registered for anything like the BundleMe with Mac, since he was born in May and cold weather was not on my mind at the time, but I'm kicking myself now for not getting this sooner and saving myself a lot of hassle.  It took about 5 minutes for my husband to get situated on the car seat before we left  the house and it saved us so much trouble with making sure Mim was warm enough while we were out and about.  Being a July baby, all Mim's 0-3 month clothing is summer stuff.  I'm not exactly sure what I was thinking (hello pregnancy brain), but I don't have hardly any warm clothing for this child until she's 6 months. Seriously, she has about 75 short sleeve onesies and a couple dozen sundresses for this age, but only a handful of items with sleeves.  She's actually wearing Mac's old pajamas here, because I couldn't find anything warm and clean for her to wear.  I need to get my act together.
Anyway, the JJ Cole BundleMe was a lifesaver.  It was a cold morning and thankfully I didn't have to put a bunch of clothing on her, which of course you have to take off to put her in the car seat so the straps are tight enough, then put back on when you arrive.  With the BundleMe, once she fell asleep in the car on the ride there, we didn't have to wake her up to put clothes on her when we arrived or worry about covering her with blankets that always fall off the stoller and get run over and drug around on the ground.  We just popped the car seat out of the car and onto the stroller and she was nice and toasty warm in there the whole time we were at the pumpkin patch.  So thank you, JJ Cole for sending me this product to review.  I was not expecting to love it as much as I did.
Mac was pretty apprehensive at first and it took him a while to get used to the place (just long enough for us to get to the goats) and get off of daddy's shoulders, but as soon as he did, he was his usual 100 mph self.  We kept running into people we knew (with significantly more well-behaved children) and attempted multiple adult conversations to no avail as Mac kept dragging us away by running through crowds and straight into mud puddles and Mim cried nonstop unless she was moving in the stroller so we couldn't stop for even a minute.  I mean, such a relaxing trip! Now I remember why we've been mainly staying home on weekends.  Seriously, does it get easier?  The only saving grace was that they sold beer in the refreshment tent.  We were not above being those parents drinking at 9:30 a.m. on a Sunday morning.  Don't judge.
About 10 minutes after getting there, Mim decided she needed to eat immediately, but took her sweet time eating.  It takes girlfriend about half an hour to finish a bottle, so we took turns feeding her while the other person chased Mac around.  Divide and conquer. Some day I have hopes that we'll be able to do something (anything) all together as a family of four instead of in pairs. How in the world do people have more than 2 children?  Any why isn't it more socially acceptable to have a sister wife?
Once she'd eaten, Mim was in a much better mood, allowing us to explore the pumpkin patch.  We hit the playground, picked out pumpkins, checked out the garden, played on the tractors, etc., which took a whole 5 minutes before Mac declared he was ready to go home.
Mac was in a mood.  He wanted nothing to do with me, so it was like pulling nails trying to get him to be in a few photos with me.  Only daddy would do.  And God forbid if daddy got anywhere close to Mim - cue the waterworks.  However, he did really like the pumpkins.  He wanted to take home every pumpkin he saw.  He walked around trying to lift up each one and saying, "I like this one. I love this one. I want this one."  It was adorable...right up until he got a splinter in his hand from the stems and realized that we would not be taking all the pumpkins he picked out home with us.  Worst parents ever. 
We finally made our way over the big pumpkin field, where I wanted to get a family photo of the four of us. This was really my only goal for the day (other than just survive).  I wanted just one single family picture. ONE.  Unfortunately, that's not as easy to do as it sounds.  First of all, you have to find a willing bystander to take your photo. You make sure all the settings on your camera are perfect and just hope and pray that they can figure out how to focus on the people and not the background.  I try to find someone carrying around a DSLR, but you can't really trust anyone, even if they're carrying around a fancy camera.  90% of people with a nice camera do not know how to use it.  Second, you have to wake the (finally peacefully sleeping) baby up and pull her out of her nice warm car seat and into the bright sun, making her majorly unhappy.  Third, you have to convince the toddler to stand still for just a few seconds while someone takes the photo with mommy's camera while he's screaming "MOMMY'S CAMERA!!!" at the one kind soul that offered to take the photo.  Expecting him to actually look at the camera would be going above and beyond and you have better odds of winning the lottery.  Lastly, you quickly jump back in the photo, suck in (with hopes that you do not look like you're still 4 months pregnant) and worry that you don't have spinach in your teeth from breakfast.  And by "spinach," I really mean Lucky Charms.
Nailed it.
Of course, what you don't realize from this semi-decent family photo (nevermind the fact that Mac's hand is in his face, our legs are chopped off and we have a giant white warehouse in the background) is the fact that while I was trying to get this all set up, the toddler has been running through a field of mud (and maybe some manure) and climbing on (and falling off of) rotten pumpkins and now smells so godawful that you start looking for a hose to spray him down before you put him back in the car.  
And then he brings me a beautiful giant stinkbug.  "Look mama!  A beetle! Take him home?" As he's putting the bug in his pocket.

Toddlers are so much fun!!!!!!!!!!
Here, we attempted to get a photo of each of us with the kids.  Valiant effort, but not the greatest results.  At least one of us is looking at the camera.
The kids were getting tired (and so damn whiny), but on our way back to the car Mac spied the mini train and insisted on a ride.  By insisted, I mean threw himself on the ground kicking and screaming until we told him yes.  I got to ride with him because Ryan wouldn't fit in the little car, which Mac was not happy about, but tolerated.  Seriously, I am chopped liver if Ryan's around.  
We rode the mini train two times and Mac was insisting on more.  Fortunately we were able to quickly high-tail it back to the car (with bribery) and get the hell out of there as fast as possible before anyone had a meltdown.  So there you have it. The real story of a pumpkin patch outing.  So please know, that just because the photos are pretty, doesn't mean that it wasn't a total shit-show.  This is life, folks.  Just keeping it real. :)


Anyone else have pumpkin patch drama?


*I received the JJ Cole BundleMe free for review purposes.  All opinions expressed are 100% my own. The product pictured is the Urban BundleMe in "Ice" color.  The BundleMe is available at buybuyBABY.com and BabiesRUs.com.  

29 comments:

  1. Haha, this is hilarious! And way too cute! LOVE your family photo - hand in face and all - and YES - why aren't sister wives more acceptable?! I am for it! :)

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  2. The photos are beautiful and the memories are true to life :). We visited a patch this weekend and also woke a baby for pictures and had a 7 year old throwing a fit because we had to leave to he wanted to stay.

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  3. Oh man, what a day! Your photos are gorgeous, even though they don't tell the whole story ;) Thanks for keeping it real though, and I completely agree- HOW does anyone do activities with more than 2 kids?! Families with 4+.... I have no idea.

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  4. Omg, can I just say I LOVE your honesty! Our trip sounded exactly like yours but we only have one. I can't imagine having 2+?! I was laughing reading this entire post because I could relate to every word.

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  5. Man, pictures are definitely deceiving. Looks like no one was there and that you had a relaxing day! Sounds like our trip except we got stuck IN a corn maze with a screaming 3 month old and a toddler who refused to walk and a mama who shouldn't have worn boots with heels!

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  6. Haha love your honesty. But you are making me even more nervous about what is to come for me in less than 3 months. And it will be like negative 30 degrees by then, so what is one to do with an outside loving toddler with a newborn?!?! And why didn't I think of this before getting pregnant?!
    But your pictures are really good even without Mac's attention, and you are looking great girl! Love that sweater/scarf combo. Hope you are enjoying your last bit of maternity leave!

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  7. Love it! That looks like such a fun place! I always appreciate your honesty...thanks for keeping it real :)

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  8. I feel your pain... I drove my husband nuts this past weekend at the pumpkin patch chasing around Stella in hopes of getting just one I loved haha! Good thing you take such pretty pictures, the kids look adorable as always:)

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  9. What a great time at the pumpkin patch! Looks so much fun!

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  10. Mim's little yawn face?!?! I die. Seriously. Waaaay too precious.
    And amen to sister wives! I totally need one, haha!
    Despite the drama, you DID get some super cute pictures, so win???

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  11. LOVE!!!! What a fabulous post!

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  12. I need to say THANK YOU for this post. I had a similar experience and I always feel like my child is the only one sucking (I mean misbehaving)!

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  13. Again with the parallel lives of our boys. I just wrote a blog post last week and used the same "chopped liver" reference. I thought boys were supposed to be Mama's boys?? I think Rees would be happy if I ran away and joined the circus. Glad to hear I'm not the only one!

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  14. HA! LOVE IT! I am dying at the real-ness of this whole post. Your experience sounds about like any and every outing we ever attempt. Maybe one day a picture will be taken where I'm not bribing or begging for a smile…

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  15. hahahah!! I love your real-ness. Being the mom of a little boys is SO MUCH FUN...... ha!!!!

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  16. Oh, your sweet family!! I love this...I love how you "nailed" your family picture - it's just perfect!! And, of course, your pictures are gorgeous, as always! What great memories :)

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  17. Hilarious and so true! We only have one baby and I don't even know how I would function with two. We literally raced out of the door to go to the pumpkin patch because we had a small window of time between naps and forgot the baby carrier. It was great to see you and your family at the pumpkin patch (along with everyone else who had the same idea). We got zero good photos - so you are one step ahead!

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  18. Haha, this made me laugh. We had some similar problems at the pumpkin patch (toddler was being good but baby was getting hungry and NOT happy about the situation). Sigh. So much for getting good family photos! At least I got some cute ones of the toddler. I think your photos are cute though!

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  19. Beautiful photos! Looks like an awesome pumpkin patch! I cannot imagine getting two kiddos ready for that!

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  20. I love that despite the craziness, you still managed to take some gorgeous photos!

    I also have that fear/irritation when no one else seems to understand how to use their DSLR.

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  21. Oh my gosh, this looks/sounds like such a wonderful time! I love seeing all these pumpkin patch pictures. I especially love the "Punkin Tree". That made me giggle. Tee hee! :)

    Mandie ~ http://badbrewpack.blogspot.com/

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  22. Love these pictures! We had a JJCole Urban Bundle Me for Elyse & I'm actually excited to break it out again for Elyse. It was the perfect weight without having to bundle her up like an eskimo every time!

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  23. I love the real-ness of this post! You're so brave for going out and doing something that alone is a win! And everyone's still alive right?! As usual you still got some great photos and hey you lived to tell that story!

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  24. Were you at the pumpkin patch with us today?!?! Because you just narrated my whole day. No joke!
    We stopped by a pumpkin patch a couple weeks ago just to walk around because we were really going to the patch today and Mason LOVED it. Picked up EVERY pumpkin in the place and wanted to take it home. Mama thought "yes! pumpkin patch will be a success!". Well toddler must be able to read minds because today's trip was less than perfect. Every direction we wanted to go in, Mason ran in the opposite direction. Seth ran after him while I yelled "can you get him and bring him over here for a picture?!". Then Mason would come back and yell "NO!" when I tried to take a picture. Then had a meltdown. Then had a snack and was good to go for... 5 min. And don't worry, there's more. Without leaving a blog post on your comment field, I'm blogging about it on Tuesday if you want to read the rest of the drama lol :) Don't worry mama, you're not alone!

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  25. your fam is so cute! i can't wait to go there this year with Blair!

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  26. Haha I am cracking up over here. We are headed out to the apple orchard/pumpkin patch this coming friday and this is likely how our trip will end up!! Your pictures really are cute though :)

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  27. I randomly stumbled across your blog and I'm so happy I did!! This is fantastic thank you for the honesty behind the perfect photos such an amazing reminder.

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  28. hahaha, man you make it sound awesome! Glad you can't smell rotten pumpkins via the internet. yuck...

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  29. I just realized (after seeing the Rombach Rd sign) that we probably live in the city and must have a mutual lawyer/mom friend that recommended your blog on facebook! I've been following for a while - your blog is fantastic. Do you mind sharing what camera lense you used to take these pictures? I'm working on my Christmas list!!

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